Crimes again food: My concoction of the candy bar pie

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, you know that I am a nerd.  And pretty proud of it…I own it, as a matter of fact!  I wear that badge with honor.

And like most nerds, I have a lot of obsessions.  For the most part, on this blog, I have focused on Stephen King, as he is one of my top obsessions.  I love reading his books, reading about his books, looking at King inspired artwork, trying to create my own King inspired artwork and of course, blogging about him.  It certainly keeps me busy!

But I don’t want to seem like a nerd without substance or one dimensional.  So today’s blog post will cover one of my other obsessions:  kitchen wizardry!  No, I don’t have Gandalf or Randall Flagg hanging out in my kitchen…I am talking about baking!  I know baking is pure science (at least according to my man Alton Brown) but it can sometimes seem like magic.  You measure out and mix a bunch of random stuff together and put it in the oven for a bit, and then you (hopefully) get something yummy that your friends and family then want to fight over…seems pretty magical to me!

Alton Brown 1

And I like to be creative in the kitchen.  There is nothing wrong with the classics, but I like to put spins on things, and be innovative.  Sometimes I am downright bizarre.  Hence, I consider myself to be a crime against food.  In other words, I’m not like a regular criminal…I am a cool criminal!  And my crimes will make your party just that much more fun!


Last week, something intriguing popped up in my Facebook newsfeed (my amount of time online can either be seen as unhealthy, or a good inspiration…pick your poison).  It was a recipe for a pie, which is something I love.  But this was no ordinary pie…it was a candy bar pie!  Hold the phone, you have my attention!  I love pies!  I love candy bars!  So could anything be better than combining them?  Heck, is this even legal in the free world?  My urge to commit another culinary crime could no longer be ignored, so I set to work in my magical kitchen.

I worked, along with my trusty sous chefs pictured below, to re-create this magical concoction.  And the result…you remember those monster cookies you had a kid, that had everything except (maybe) the kitchen sink in cookie format, and you just wanted to stuff your face with that big gob of yummy?  Well, that’s what this is, except in pie format.  And everything is better when its a pie, right?

candy bar pie 015candy bar pie 010

So, my first step was to make a pie crust.  You can buy pre-made ones, and I will never judge for that.  But I love to make my own pie crusts, and my hands and arms needed a workout.  So I made my own all butter crust (speaking of criminal) the night before I made the actual pie.  Pie crusts do well to rest overnight and are a little easier to work with after they have been rested.

candy bar pie 002

And then I rolled it out (my muscles are still tingling, I have been slack on my workouts) and placed in into the pie dish.  I made some sad attempts at crimping (she will never be a beauty queen, but they say beauty is only crust deep) and then put my crust into the freezer.  I think this causes the crust to bake up a little bit crisper and also keep its shape.

candy bar pie 007

Then, while my crust was getting her beauty freeze, I proceeded to make the filling to the pie.  I used my stand mixer to mix everything up, although a hand held will work just fine.  I love my stand mixer almost as much as I love the sexy stud who found it on Craigslist in what is probably the deal of the year, at least in our house.

candy bar pie 008

I then creamed the egg, sugar and butter.  I became hypnotized by the mixer…it is a thing of beauty to watch, especially when you don’t have to mix it yourself.  If someone could just invent a machine to roll out a pie crust, I will be set!

candy bar pie 011

I then added the flour and vanilla (I used vanilla bean paste, which is a little more decadent, but extract will work just as well).  After the batter was mixed came the fun part:  adding the candy!  I used M&M’s, Rolos and Snickers.  But any candy will work just fine.  And there may or may not have been some sampling of the add ins…someone needs to taste test, don’t you think?

candy bar pie 012

I then removed the crust from her freezer beauty sleep, and placed the filling into the crust.  I also covered the edges with aluminum foil, to prevent burning of the crust (a lesson learned the hard way years ago in my misspent youth).  I also garnished the top with extra candy pieces.  You know, since there wasn’t enough candy in the filling before…duh.

candy bar pie 018


And then it was off into the oven we go!

candy bar pie 019

The recipe said said about 30 minutes, but I am not sure which 30 minutes it was referring to, as my pie took close to an hour to bake.  Or maybe my oven decided to slack off, since I actually had to be somewhere last night.  But this was the final result:

candy bar pie 022

Not bad, although it was maybe a little over-browned…next time (and this is too awesome for there not to be a next time) I will take the foil off a little later.  And experiment some more…I am sure putting Kit Kats and Milky Way bars into this will bump me up to a class A felony!

So happy early Pi day everyone!  This is a great dessert for any occasion, whether its an early Pi Day celebration, or maybe you just feel like celebrating Flag day…cheers!


Click here for the recipe.



This awesome site has lots of great pie recipes too!


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